The Turgid Bud

If you've ever read a romance then you might have noticed that sometimes authors choose rather flowery terms to describe intimate parts. All right, actually, some of the terms can be downright ridiculous! This is a collection of such terms gleaned from blog posts and forum threads. If there is a chance this might induce shock and pearl clutching, please do not go any further. However, if your interest has been piqued, then check out The List!

The idea (and name!) for this website comes from Oopsie Doodle. She thought it would be great if all the ridiculous, overblown terms for body parts that you would find in a romance novel were collected in one place.

I have read romance books but it's been a while since I've read any that used such - descriptive - language. I compiled this list from old blog posts and forum threads. If your favorite term isn't here, e-mail me!

This website is a work in progress. I have ideas to include sections on other terminology and, possibly, even a quiz so do check back!

If you'd like to follow, help yourself to a button!

🌷 = new entries!

Female parts

aching rainbow
the apex of her thighs
berry
bud
cave of desire 🌷
chalice
cove
delta 🌷
enchanted grotto 🌷
feathery down
flower
forbidden passage
gateway to paradise
the heart of her femininity
honeyed canal 🌷
honeypot
jewel
knot/center of pleasure
love button
love canal
mossy grotto of venus
mound of Venus
mountain of pleasure
mouth of her arousal
nub
palace of delight 🌷
pearl
petals
pink cradle 🌷
pink pearl
pool of moisture
rosebud
silken heat
silken warmth
sugared walls
tender feminine folds 🌷
throbbing vent
the vaults of her love chamber
velvet haven
velvet sheath
womanly cave 🌷

Male parts

There are many euphemisms for penis but, sadly, it seems that in the romance world most of the flowery descriptions go to lady parts.

bulge
great silky spearhead of his desire
great, monstrous invader 🌷
girth
hard, thick man-root 🌷
length
jade pillar/sword/pipe
lust-swollen rod 🌷
manhood
manroot
member
rod
rod of joy/desire 🌷
shaft
stalk
steel wrapped in velvet
sword/sheathed to the hilt
throbbing scepter of priapus
throbbing tor
velvet helmet 🌷

While researching for this site, I came across several sites that were interesting but didn't entirely fit within the scope of "fanciful terms for parts from romances." I thought I would go ahead and share them here.

Reddit Thread - Long List of Creative Anatomy - There are whole subgenres of paranormal/sci fi/fantasy romance that deal with nonhuman beings and their associated parts. There is a link to a Google doc that the thread author keeps updated - in fact, the original doc got too big and that one has links to other docs.
The Difficulties of Writing Really Old Erotic Historical Romances - Interesting blog post from an author on why there aren't a lot of erotic novels set in ancient times.
Before A Penis Was A Penis: Sex Slang Throughout History - Article discussing the first usages of "penis" and "vagina."
WTF Fanfiction - Words Used to Describe Genitals - Tumblr post with terms the author found in fan fiction. In addition to sections for penis and vagina, there is an "others" section for associated things.
Croatia has enchanting words for genitalia. Why doesn't the UK? - Opinion piece on how the Croatians have better slang words for some body parts.
1811 Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue by Francis Grose (Project Gutenberg) - A dictionary of vulgar slang "particularly focusing on the jargon of the lower orders of society, including thieves, pickpockets, and bawds, as well as terms from university slang." This is a general dictionary of slang, not just for intimate parts. You can either download a file or read it online.

Sources

Image credits

Website framework

John Doe's page